Easier
by Raven173
Summary: Somethings are just easier left unsaid. (eventual HarryPansy)


"Frightened?"

I shivered, entering the cold bleak room, where only he, and a handful of others sat. From the downcast looks on everyone's faces, I knew things were not going well. I put on a brave face. "Of course not!" I replied, trying hard, but with little success to smile.

He raised an eyebrow. "Don't fool yourself. Of course you are".

I sat down next to him, the sense of despair washing over me greater than ever. "We aren't going to get out alive, are we?" I asked him, failing to keep the panic out of my voice

He laughed, high and unnatural. "We probably will. I think he has greater plans for us than to kill us off now. Think of the pleasure he'll have from torturing us."

The fragments of the smile I was trying to muster broke under his words. "He wouldn't do that, I don't think."

"Well, there's little chance he'll accept me with open arms. Be realistic. I'm his enemy, he'll want to do as much harm as possible to me. If you were him, wouldn't you?" he paused as the bitterness of these words sank in. "And besides" he added "Would you really trustus? Any of us?" he gestured around the room. The scant few who remained were looking as lost and dejected as I felt. One was crying softly to herself, few were muttering to each other, fake words of reassurance. Yet another was curled up in a ball, twitching at regular intervals. I ignored him, watching his struggle with sanity made me feel sick with fear

"I never thought I'd die like this," I said, turning my head away from the twitching man

"I never thought I'd die" he responded. "At least, not yet"

"Things aren't that fair. We chose the wrong side." I chose to say, stating the obvious.

He didn't respond, but just closed his eyes and nodded. A crash ripped through the building then, sending books from the shelf nearby tumbling off in an avalanche of paper

"Another wing gone probably" I said, standing up, brushing dark hair out of my eyes. "Wonder how long we'll last?"

"Not long now" he uttered. "He's just playing with us, destroying our morale. He could take us now if he chose. I for one would welcome it." he laughed the same high laugh again.

"Would you really?" I asked. "I don't think so somehow. I think you like life too much, even now to just surrender it so easily. You'll die fighting."

"So confident of me and my abilities then?" he sounded surprised.

"Of course" I said, looking around. The deep red velvet curtains that normally framed the window had been rippedslightly and were blowingfiercly against the open window. I stood beside it, looking out onto the battlefield.

"Its nice to know one of us still has so much faith" he smiled, eyes still closed. "I can barely remember the time when I had so much zeal."

I said nothing, letting him remember. No words could ever, nor would evercapture memories. Our memories.I dreamed too. After a while, when shrieks and wails from nearby had been cut dead, harsh incantations smothered and destroyed, the characteristic bangs and booms of wands being broken, magic flowing onto the ground in a current of pure energy. When all that had died like I knew it had done, he spoke again.

"What do you think would have happened if we had chose the other side?"

I turned suddenly. "What do you mean?"

"Don't be silly," he chided. "What do you think would have happened if we had chose the other side? What do you think would have happened to us?"

"We would still be alive" I said bluntly. "We'd be winning the war, most of our friends would still be alive, and we would have lived happily ever after. It would have been perfect" I spat out the last word.

"He didn't have to die you know." My friend said, unusually perceptive. He stood up to put his arm on my shoulder. "He didn't have to"

"I know…" I trailed off. Just thinking about it brought tears to my eyes. How could I still be so weak? I thought to myself, as I let one drip off my face. "Its just…he said he would stay with me. He said he would never leave me. He lied…"

"I know he did. He lied to us all."

"At least he never lived to see it come to this. None of them did. For that, I am happy" I nestled my head against the crook of his neck, burying myself against the reassurance of his body. He looked a little nervous but held me anyway. I continued. "I still love him"

"Of course" he shushed. "You were his fiancée. You were in love. Death can't cut through such strong bonds."

Again, I said nothing; I brushed another tear from my eye. From over his shoulder, I could see the red curtain still blowing in the wind. Streaks of light were whistling across the sky, sending the mountains and nearby trees an eerie red colour. It reminded me of blood. I had seen so much blood that it was hard not to compare sometimes.

"Will you leave me?" I shuddered suddenly with cold against him.

"No." he replied, drawing me even closer. "I'll stay with you until the end. It's the least I can do."

"Thank you" I breathed, feeling safer than I had done in many months. Years, possibly.

"Its no problem. I know he would have wanted you to be safe." His eyes were gentle and soft, so unlike their usual self. I could see my own face, tear-struck reflected in them. I wanted to turn away, but he captivated me. I couldn't turn away. Slowly, he leaned down and gently kissed me. I knew that I should probably back off, tell him that he was making a mistake, that I didn't like him like that, but before I knew it, I was melting into his arms, and nothing else mattered. It didn't matter to me that I was about to be killed or worse, didn't matter that I was kissing my fiancés best friend, didn't matter that it felt so right when I knew it shouldn't be that way, didn't matter that I any guilt whatsoever about betraying his memory. Nothing mattered.

"I've been wanting to do that for the longest time" he whispered in my ear.

"So have I." I said, realising that it had been true. I let him brush his fingers through my hair, before kissing me again.

Another crash, louder this time and much more urgent crashed through the room.

"They're breaking through our blockade," he said, still holding me. "We are running out of time."

The few others what were in the room with us had by now stopped their pointless talks of reassurance, and looked scared, worried, panicking. They looked doomed. They were, I told myself, but then again, so was I. The man that had been twitching to himself carried on doing so, unaware of where he was or anything. The blank look he had in his eyes terrified me to the very bone but I said nothing. It was easier.

Another crash. The heavy wooden doors that were the last defence against the savagery of our attackers shook. A muffled shout. Another crash. I turned to him.

"We better make what time we have worth something." I said, drawing him in for another kiss.

"Knowing you was worth it." He told me, eyes alight with a contagious passion. "I'd rather die with you in my arms than die fighting"

I didnt know what to say. What could I have said? I said nothing.

The door burstopen with a mighty crash. The last thing I remembered was he kissing me before they burst through, cursing screaming, heading right for me…

"I got him" the heavy cloaked man said. "I got the little git."

"I'm sorry we had to do that" said another man, who seemed to be the leader. "I really wish it wasn't this way."

"But it is" the first man said. "He had it coming to him. He shouldn't have killed all those people. He has only himself to blame."

"Has he?" the leader asked. He looked down at the bodies below him sadly. "I'm not so sure."

"Now isn't the time for sentimentalities" the man with the heavy cloak said. He limped towards the man he had just killed, his wooden leg clunking against the marble floor. "We have a job to do. Don't forget that"

"I know" the leader said. "I just don't like killing. I never will. I just don't think nobody, even he deserves death."

He kneeled down to where the first two bodies were. One stared up at him, pale eyes lifeless and blank. His heart went to his mouth for a moment, raw emotion running through his body in waves. He forced himself to look at that cruel body without beingsick at the sight of how wasted it was. Butthe other…

"Hey- she's still alive!"

"What?" the man turned from his investigation of the other bodies, each one linedrow onrow like toy soldiers, knocked over. by some careless child

"She is still alive. She's breathing." The leader lifted her up with easily, holding her tightly in his arms. He sounded amazed.

"I don't believe it," the man with the wooden leg said. "What are the chances?"

"I don't know." The leader said. He stopped to look at the wasted face of his former classmate. "She never did anything wrong you know. Just mixed with the wrong crowd."

"She was a Slytherin. If you ask me, they're all the wrong crowd"

Before the man could answer, a woman strolled into the room. "We've cleared them all" she said, before looking down. Her eyes, so big and brown froze withrealisation."Oh my god…" she whispered, weakly.

"Yes. Its him." The man said to the woman a little harshly. "The little ferret who gave me this" he gestured at his wooden leg his voice rich and bitter

"Malfoy" she breathed. "But what…"

"I don't know Hermione," said the leader. "We need to tell the others. Can you and Ron send word ahead? She's still alive, but weak." He looked down at her "She should get the chance to live. I wont kill her now"

Hermione eyes narrowed. "Are you sure about this Harry?" she asked. "You did kill her fiancé, and now, her best friend." Hermione strolled aroundDraco's damp body "At least,I think they were best friends." She shrugged. "Maybe more." she paused, unsure how to continue."She might not thank you saving her… she might not even want to be saved" the Muggleborn witch said finally, very careful how she chose her words

"Just do it" Harry ordered wearily. He hadnt the patience to argue with them.

He waited until the others had left the room.They didnt speak, just tossed each other a significant look and left, Ron's leg clunking against the marblefloor. "Pansy"Harry said softly. "I'm so sorry it has to be this way. I'm so sorry that I've done this to you. It just has to be this way. You chose the wrong side…"

He could have said more . He didnt. It was easier

Ok. So maybe I lied.


End file.
